It's Your Birth Right!!

A few days ago, I had the pleasure and honor of being a speaker at the recent AWHONN (Association of Women’s Health Obstetrical and Neonatal Nursing) conference in San Diego.

My topic… Using the evidence to reclaim the role of patient advocate.

It was a great experience and it gave me the opportunity to present to many nurses about how important it is for us to champion the cause of the patient.  While it was great to get my message out, the thing is, I was preaching to the choir as one might say.

It is exciting to know that there is a large and growing community of nurses out there who want to help women have the birth experience they desire and are willing to fight on behalf of patients no matter what. The problem is, we are scattered across the country, and when you arrive to the hospital to have your baby, YOU may not get THAT nurse.  

Please understand that ALL nurses work HARD, and all nurses care about our patients and we want them to have optimal outcomes. Unfortunately some of us just don’t know what to do to help a patient receive the outcomes she desires.  That being said, while it is very important for a nurse to know how, and to be willing to advocate for a patient, it is as important for a woman going to the hospital for her birth, to know how to advocate for herself.

I have talked about choosing the right provider, and creating the right birth team; both of these things will help with your personal advocacy. There are other things that can be done and I plan to discuss some of them later.  For now, at the request of a few people who attended my presentation, I wanted to share with you a poem I wrote to exemplify how some women feel during her pregnancy and labor experience. I hope you enjoy it!

All she wanted was to birth a healthy baby

All she wanted was to birth a healthy baby.
She was excited about the months ahead.
She knew her baby was a blessing.
She wanted what was best. 
She changed her diet and started exercising
She wanted to birth a healthy baby.
So she did what the books and websites told her.

All she wanted was to birth a healthy baby.
A boy is what they told her.
She never needed an ultrasound.
She knew EXACTLY when the one night of passion that created the life happened
She wanted the gender to be a surprise
Her measurements were always right on target
She never really wanted an ultrasound
But they made her feel like something could be wrong
Something that only the magic wand with goopy gel could tell her.
She wanted to birth a healthy baby.
So she conceded and did what her providers told her

All she wanted was to birth a healthy baby.
They said the baby looked big. 
Just last week, her measurements were right on target.
She did not understand.
She wanted to birth a healthy baby.
Would his size really make a difference?
Before now she had faith in her body.
But they made her feel unsure
She wanted to birth a healthy baby.
So she listened, and scheduled another ultrasound.

All she wanted was to birth a healthy baby.
The repeat ultrasound showed the baby had gained more weight.
How accurate are those things anyway?
Wasn’t the baby supposed to be gaining weight?
Nine pounds didn’t sound too big to her.
Big babies ran in her family
But predictions of a term birth weight of 10lbs or more made her doubtful.
Her trust in her innate abilities began to fade; She became fearful.
She wanted to birth a healthy baby;
So she listened to her providers and scheduled her induction with a closed cervix, and intense fear.

She came as she was instructed at 5am.
She had gotten no sleep,
She had eaten no food
She was operating off adrenaline, and she was full of fear and anticipation.
She wanted to birth a healthy baby
So she followed the rules and listened to what they said was best.
The entire day seemed to be a rapidly moving blur of various demands, commands, and instructions

Put on this gown.
Get in this bed.
Let me start this IV.
We are going to start Pitocin.
You have to keep still.
You have to stay in bed.
You have to keep the monitors on.
They are here to break your water.
No you can’t get out of bed.
We need to use these internal monitors.
No you can’t have any water and certainly no food.
Here are a few ice chips.
Didn’t your doctor tell you how this was going to go?!
Yes of course it’s painful.
YOU should get an epidural and for the last time NO you can’t get out of bed.
I am glad you are finally comfortable.
Let me put this tube in your bladder, you won’t feel it.
Hope you don’t get an infection.
We are going to increase the Pitocin.
Your baby’s heart rate dropped.
Quick, turn to your left side.
Breathe this oxygen.
You are only 4 cm dilated.
I’m going to call your doctor. 
Open the OR its 5PM.
Lets get her ready for her c/section…..

All she wanted was to birth a healthy baby.
In her heart she wanted to speak up,
But she wanted to birth a healthy baby so she took their advice.
She listened to her doctor.
She listened to her nurse.
When all along she was waiting for someone, anyone, is there one… all she wanted was one,
One person to hear HER voice.
One person to help make HER voice louder and stronger. 

 All she wanted was to birth a healthy baby….and it seems everyone else, just wanted to control the process.

 In Birth and Love
Nicole